Tuesday, March 10, 2009

The greatest blessing of being born a woman

The miracle of carrying a new life within you and bringing it into this world is the greatest blessing a woman has. The experience of those nine months is something every woman looks forward to and I guess would never be forgotten after experiencing it.

The joy of knowing that you are carrying inside you a new life and that now you are not one but two. 2 of my friends from school are expecting and they say how the baby kicks since their 6th and 7th months of pregnancy. The period when our whole personality changes when we start eating thinks which we hated before just because the life which we carry inside loves it. How our disposition changes to some of what the baby would have. We start loving some particular scents which we never knew existed before.

How we can know even before the baby is born if the baby is going to be a late or early sleeper or riser. My aunt while she was expecting my cousin brother would tell that he used to be up and active till after midnight and used to get up late in the morning sometimes getting her into panic as he used to not move until 11 in the morning. When my cousin was born this was what he continued to be a late sleeper and a late riser.

I am yet to experience this miracle which I have been looking forward to. The miracle of carrying and giving life, it is something which I count as the greatest blessing that God can ever bestow upon a human being and he blessed only us women to do this miracle. One of the reasons I feel lucky to be born a woman.

Splendours of the sun

The rising sun is synonymous to a bindi adorning the forehead of a married Hindu woman enhancing her beauty and making her feel complete.

The rising sun is like a reddish orange glowing bindi adorning the white summer morning sky which has just risen from its slumber. Yet to reach its fiery best and shoot arrows of fire down on earth, the time when we can match eye to eye with the sun. A spectacle if to be seen we have to rise early.

The beauty of the rising sun is different from that of a setting sun. The setting sun is much more beautiful and is more splendorous as it wants us to never forget it and wants us to wait eagerly for it to rise again the next day. The setting sun casts it spell on the moving waters and the whole of the land glowing at its best till the last rays ebbs out for the night. The colors that a setting sun splashes out on earth are numerous spreading across the expanse of the whole sky layered from top till bottom.

The smell of life

The smell of mother earth when she receives the first drops of rain after the parched summer months is the best scent in the world. It is a smell that can be enjoyed only for a short time and only when there are the first showers.

It is a smell of joy, of hope, of longing, of new life, when these droplets touch earth she is so happy that you can literally feel her dancing with joy and that is when this beautiful scent arises. She has been longing for these showers for a long time and when it hits her it gives her the hope of starting life anew on her. All the plant and living creatures that are her children will now thrive. New buds will come forth and earth would turn green and young again. She won’t look all dusty, parched and lifeless it is the time of rebirth and starting life anew for mother earth.

It is my favourite scent in the world a scent for which I too wait like mother earth just longing for it through the dry dreary months. I dance out with joy like the peacock when I see the black cloud rolling in and know that finally my long wait for this unique smell has come to an end. I too like mother earth feel it in my senses when the first drops touch earth and the scent just rises up. A scent most divine the scent of joy, hope, longing and new life.

Friday, March 06, 2009

Consequences of marriage

Some of my good friends both guys and gals have taken the plunge and have started on the bend in road, “marriage”. And it is wonderful to find that there is pattern that is common existing to all of them. 3 of my girl friends (don’t get me wrong friends who are girls is all that this means) and 2 of my boyfriends (same applies here guys who are my friends).

My girlfriends have quit their jobs and moved to Mumbai, Bangalore and US where their better half are employed. All 3 of them have taken it as their life’s mission to excel in the world of culinary art. As they have quit their job and are now endowed with the name of housewife till the time they find themselves another job in the cities they have migrated to, their major source of entertainment is that of cooking. I guess they are trying to prove the saying that “The way to mans heart is through the stomach”. Well I think this activity would ensure one thing, them getting into shape with out having to hit the gym :)

Well with regard to my boyfriends they seem to have achieved greater levels of maturity in matter of days. One of them is in the process of setting up his house from scratch and the effect of this effort on him has terrified the rest of us into taking this step in life. They seem to be suddenly entrusted with responsibilities and rudely awakened to a life they never thought would happen to them.

Monday, March 02, 2009

Let her be

This is an article which appeared in the Sunday Times in O-Zone on 1 March 09 and wanted to share it. It has striken a cord with me and my friend, I guess it is the best descrption of what I am feeling right now on the subject.
How do you know who is the right man for you, was the plaintive question a colleague, Ritu, just entering her 30’s asked the other day. Under pressure from her parents to get married within the year, she despaired of finding the right guy and dreaded ending up with the wrong one.
Actually, how do you know who’s right or wrong for you? Surprisingly one finds more women than men debating this question. You hardly ever come across a man scared of being hitched up with the wrong woman. Or at least not one who openly expresses this fear. Women are more commitment phobic these days. It used to be a man’s problem, but today many women don’t get into matrimony for fear of getting attached to the wrong partner. What goes on in a girl’s mind when she is seriously considering the ‘M’ question?
Shilpa, a professional who is unmarried at 32, says, “What holds me back is the fear that a man I like may be pretending to be somebody quite different from what he really is; how is one to know? It’s one thing to enjoy a cup of coffee with a guy and quite another to commit the next 40-45 years of your life to him!” She doesn’t feel as paranoid about striking a new friendship or getting a new job. “Well, of course not,” she says, you can always walk away from a friend or a job; the emotional commitment isn’t so high, but not so from a husband and a family!”
Amrita, a colleague who at 36, is yet to tie the knot, says, “My fears stem from a lot of ‘what ifs’... it’s like you want to know or sort out issues before you actually marry, later will be too late! Is he a cribber? Is he honest? Does he have a sense of integrity? What if I end up tied to a man who is a big bore!”
When Hillary Clinton was asked how she knew that Bill Clinton was her one true love, she replied, “How does anybody know about love? If you can describe it, you may not fully be experiencing it.....My husband is my best friend. We have an endless conversation...we never get bored.”
A lady bureaucrat, Pooja, now happily married with a daughter, recalls how determined she was to satisfy the “inner romantic” within her. “I had to find ‘Mr Right’; the only other option, which didn’t seem too bad either, was to stay unmarried. I could support myself, my time and space were my own; what did I need a man for except perhaps for companionship and to enhance the quality of a life I already led?”
“It had to be someone who shared a general sense of compatibility with me, someone who enjoyed and could share what I wanted of my life. He had to share my value system and be a man I could respect; or at least someone I couldn’t just dismiss; someone who was not unintelligent...”
Note the way the selection process became one of elimination rather than selection for Pooja. She wanted an intelligent guy, but would have been happy with one who was “not unintelligent.” A guy she could respect, or at least, as she put it, someone she “couldn’t just dismiss.”
Sometimes the choice becomes easier by first eliminating what you just will not accept in a life companion rather than looking for the qualities you want. For instance, if you are clear you will not be able to respect a guy with a squeaky voice, or a man who finds it difficult to smile, or someone who drinks or smokes, those are the things to watch out for and clarify first, and the rest follows.
Coming back to how does one know, most women who have met their destined men, insist that you just know. “It’s a feeling,” Pooja tries to explain. When she did meet her soul mate, she describes it as “a gentle feeling...he was bright and fun loving. I knew men... I had enough friends and batch mates...but what was most appealing about my husband was that he was one of the few men I met who gave me this feeling of space...I could be Pooja around him!”
And really, this is what most women are seeking in their men today; just the opportunity to remain themselves. Agrees Ritu, “I want the freedom to keep doing what I love — reading, writing, composing poems. I don’t want someone to clamp me or my aspirations. I want a deep companionship, where we can enjoy the same things together. I want friendship, and passion — for each other yes, but that fizzles out, so passion for the same things in life...” Is that too much to ask for? To just let a woman be herself?

A blank canvas awaiting to be filled.............the random thoughts which seldom stop.....a spark