This a blog written by by Vibhore Gupta on 22 Dec 2008 on MSN India I loved it and have put it up here. Hope you guys too like it.
There is one statement I’ve heard more often than any other, that statement is, “Nobody understands me”. To be honest I am not at all surprised by the frequency of this statement, the reason being, it is the tendency of human beings to stay a little secretive. Understanding a person depends more on the steps taken by the person himself as compared to the steps taken by the people around him. After all, it is me who will decide whom I want to keep inside my circle of trust and whom I want to keep outside of it.
Understanding a person does not mean doing or saying something which will please the person concerned. Those who have narrow ideology they have a tendency to please everyone around them. But a true friend of mine will be one who will recognize my long term gains. It’s very simple to be understood by someone, all we need to do is speak our heart with someone whom we feel to be trustworthy enough. We all love our families and to be honest though we love them a lot but we cannot share everything with them. It’s not that they will not understand, it’s just that our culture prevents us from doing so.
I think there are two categories of people who say, “Nobody understands me”. First category consists of fools and second category consists of again two kinds of people, one, who are betrayed by life at every step of this journey called life and second, who are lost in their own thoughts.
I don’t think it would be an effective utilization of time if we start discussing the category of fools.
So lets just jump to the other category, people who are betrayed by luck and circumstances; these people form an iron cladding around themselves, these people don’t want anybody’s help but they are ready to help others. These people are as hard as rock from inside but as soft as cotton from outside. I believe they even start hating emotions but the catch is hate itself is an emotion.
Recently, I had a conversation with a girl who is qualified to be put into this category. She says that she is the best friend of her every friend but she does not appreciate somebody’s helping attitude towards her, I think I should replace the word appreciate by hate in the previous sentence. I don’t know her even a bit but I know that something has happened in the past; something has shaken her from top to bottom. She has had losses; she has had setbacks but she stood against the tides.
When we have had failures, setbacks, losses, then we tend to become numb towards emotions. We think, “I am used to it now”. And this is exactly the statement which takes us away from our friends when we need them. We rely on ourselves way too much that we tend to forget the existence of others, and in this process we start hurting our friends and one day we are left all alone. People are all around us but we have come so far from them that now even if we try to call them all we hear is our own voice. I don’t know how to phrase my emotions here, I've been on that road, I’ve walked down that isle and I know there’s lot of loneliness on that road, there’s a lot of hatred on that isle.
I am not trying to show sympathy to anyone nor am I trying to change the thought process of someone, but if someone can get back on the lines of sharing his sorrows than I think this post will achieve its purpose. I know these people strive on the policy, “Happiness is for 'us' but sorrow is for 'me' ”. This policy leads to a lot of respect but even lot more loneliness.
Now, comes the second kind of people, the people who are lost among their thoughts and the realities of life. The problem with these kinds of people is that the actions of these people are affected by the thoughts of others. They are full of negativity, they picture themselves as a person who has all weaknesses and no strengths. They don’t think about it too often but if somebody tells them, "you think you are great", "why do you behave like this?". These words kill the self confidence of these kinds of people. The irony is that these people are surrounded by negative thoughts yet people around them think that these people are natural egoists. People think they are arrogant and are more interested in themselves and they don’t care about the people around. But believe me, they care about the people around them more then they care about themselves. But honestly, what I believe is that these people should believe in themselves more than others. Believing and caring are two different words, they should learn to go with the flow of life.
After all, every wants to be special but for that, one should know how to believe in his dreams. There is no beginning or end of this circle called life and we should know when to start running around it, it doesn’t matter if we don’t know how to walk.
I don’t know how to end this post so I’ll just put my pen down, but hey! I’m not using a pen. :-)